About Moxie Girl Musings

Moxie Girl Musings is about starting over from square one after tragedy impacted my young family. It's filled with stories of triumph, struggle, snafus, hopes, and dreams. Sometimes there will be features from other writers that I like and every so often I'll include an original short story, but normally I simply write what's on my mind at the time. Welcome to my unfiltered true-life story as I figure out this thing called life. http://www.amberleaeaston.com

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Jump off the boat

When people find out that I swam with sharks, they most commonly ask, "wasn't that scary?"  The answer is no.  The sharks were exhilarating, beautiful and completely uninterested in me.

Jumping off the boat was scary.

It's amazing the thoughts that go through your mind when you see a shark's sleek undulating body sliding through the clear Caribbean Sea beneath your flipper clad feet as they dangle from the edge of a boat.  The first is: "Oh my God, there really IS a shark there and he brought friends".  The second is:  "No way in hell am I getting off this boat, did I pay money to do this?"  The third is: "This is a really nice boat."  The fourth is: "I am insane if I actually jump in."  Then you cycle back and forth between them all within about 30 seconds. 

But then something happens...something outside of yourself kicks in...maybe it's curiosity or adrenaline or peer pressure or insanity or primal need...but suddenly you are falling into the water.  You have let go.  You are committed.  Whether you consciously chose it or not, you are now swimming with the sharks.

And it's beautiful.  You are transfixed by the way their bodies undulate through the water and glide over the sand. There's something sexy about them. You are lost in the moment.  Captivated.  Hypnotized.

When you surface you can't stop laughing from the sheer joy of pushing beyond the fear, of discovering a new world and expanding your horizons.  You conquered yourself. 

Most of life can be summed up by that experience of mine.  The actual doing is far less terrifying than the thoughts that precipitate the action.  It's easy to talk yourself out of swimming with sharks, taking a trip to a foreign place, starting a new career...or admitting you're wrong, going on that date or opening your heart again.

Jump off the boat.  Let go of the fear.  Get lost in the beauty of life.

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