Being single in my 40s is so much different than being single in my 20s. Unlike my 20 something self, I now have responsibilities like children, a mortgage and a career I actually care about. This translates to a zero tolerance for bullshit when it comes to men or petty female competition. I am simply too busy having a life to go out and get a love life.
All of that being said, I have come to a realization that I need to play more. I know quite a few artists and other entrepreneurs. One thing that they all have in common is a fierce determination to play as hard as they work. And they do. I marvel in how these successful busy people make time to simply have a good time.
Instead of jumping up this morning, sitting in front of my computer screen and stressing about my to-do list, I hung out with my dogs. After the kids went to school, I took Bella and Dusty into the backyard and played a quick game of catch. I wrestled with them a bit and laughed like a kid. Then they hung out with me while I ate breakfast and enjoyed the silence of the house. Now they are in their usual spots with one at my feet and the other behind me on her dog bed. And I feel good about sitting in front of the computer, conquering my to-do list and knowing I took a time out to play this morning.
I used to think taking time to exercise was my 'me time'. And it is, I suppose, but to me that's not playing. I know it is for some people. For me, play time equals no agenda except to have fun. It's not about calories burned; but rather it's about laughing and lightening the load. When the kids were little I used to play with them all the time---balancing them on my feet and pretending to be an airplane, taking them to the park and pushing them on the swings, reading them books about talking trains and other playful antics were a normal part of the day. Now it's all so serious: cyber-bullying talks, sex talks, swim meets, lacrosse tournaments, career days, paying bills, deadlines, carpools, marketing and aging parents.
Playtime needs to be on top of my priority list. In fact, I think most of us adults could use some serious play time in our lives. Remember how easy playing used to be in our 20-something days? We need to lighten our loads, even more now when life seems so much more serious.
It is time to play more. This doesn't mean I have acquired a tolerance for bullshit when it comes to men or petty female competition---but it does mean that I'm open for playmates as long as they know how to have fun, play fair and show up when they say they'll show up. After all, I'm a busy 40-something with a career and kids and a life that is worth the chaos. If you want to play with me, then being a good sport is essential. Time to play!
Dusty, my loyal pal.
About Moxie Girl Musings
Moxie Girl Musings is about starting over from square one after tragedy impacted my young family. It's filled with stories of triumph, struggle, snafus, hopes, and dreams. Sometimes there will be features from other writers that I like and every so often I'll include an original short story, but normally I simply write what's on my mind at the time. Welcome to my unfiltered true-life story as I figure out this thing called life. http://www.amberleaeaston.com