As Briahna and I settled into our booth for two intent on enjoying our mother-daughter time, I noticed the two couples next to us who were enjoying a bottle of wine. They looked like your average suburbanites, late 30s to early 40s, a little chubby all around and dressed casually but nice for 4PM at the Olive Garden.
Before the salad arrived, I heard my neighbors to the right start speaking loudly about the joys of spouse swapping and how they all felt it had saved their marriage. Sure enough Briahna, who is 13, looked at me and asked, "what is spouse swapping?"
My life as a parent of two adolescents is difficult enough without having to explain the swingers lifestyle. C'mon, people! Don't we know how to act in public anymore? So, being the savvy mom I am, I chewed my breadstick before saying, "no, I think they said house swapping". Briahna doesn't look like she bought my explanation but shrugged as 13 year olds often do and grabbed a breadstick.
The talk to the right only grew louder and more expressive. They loudly told the waiter about their exploits with sex, alcohol, spouse swapping and how "picky" they were in choosing what couples to invite into their circle. By this time, Briahna knew they were definitely not talking about house swapping. When they moved on to talking about outlawing butt biting because someone named Steve got carried away last weekend, I threw in the towel. This mother-daughter dinner had gotten way off track from my original intention.
I don't have a problem with what anyone does in their bedroom, just keep it at home. I do not consider myself a prude in any way and am proud to call myself a liberal. But there comes a point of knowing when a conversation should loudly take place in a quiet public dining room and when it would be best to have it in your own living room over a potluck. Heck, they could have swapped later and I could have enjoyed a nice Italian dinner with my daughter! Win-win all around.
Oh...and you can only imagine the questions Briahna had about why anyone would be biting anyone else's butt. It was a long ride home.